Tag Archives: facebook

Welcome. How on earth did you end up here?

It’s time for another visit to the search engines. Don’t you think? Let’s see how people are finding themselves in the warm and cosy world of 3limes.

ugandan cakes and pastries

Well we all know my opinion of Ugandan cake. My advice to you is to make one yourself or go directly to the Serena and pay a small fortune for a chocolate gateau. That is unless you fancy a cake that might need to be detonated with a small hand grenade before you can vacuum the morsels into your mouth or sniff them through a rolled up 100,000 Shilling note.

road trip stories

Ahhh. I have a few of those. I assume that if you are looking for stories it is because you might be thinking of a trip? My advice to you is this: bring spare tires, choose your company carefully and purchase sling shots. And maybe a pillow for the numb bum that comes from 12 hour drives. Alternatively there are such things as airplanes.

dancing in the rain photography

I had no idea there was such a genre. I have been known to dance in the rain. The first and probably most memorable time was during a summer rain shower at boarding school. It was 1985 and we had just finished our O’ levels. I clearly remember the warm rain, the freedom we felt as we danced at the far end of the rugby pitch in a quiet corner of England. It was us, the pungent grass, our wet warm shoulders and our lives laid out like a quilt ahead. However, the photography you may be referring to might be the happy girls prancing in mud and rain at Trooper’s birthday party last year. Perhaps there should be such a genre, it would be a nostalgic moment for many.

kampala man living beneath

This worries me slightly. What would he be living beneath exactly? I dare to suggest it might be a dead dog? Perhaps a pile of rotting rubbish? Maybe he has actually taken up residence beneath a giant billboard advertising a refreshing beer? He is certainly not living beneath his means.

busiest kfc in the world

This is in Trinidad. Independence square to be exact. Those Trinis do love their fried chicken. Often the hallways of our school reeked of KFC and fries on a Friday lunch time. I have no idea how they stayed so slim and beautiful. Must have been all that dancing. Happy, fried chicken lovers they are.

joy of being a great grandparent

Lovely.  I am very happy for you. But if you feel so much joy why on earth are you resorting to the search engines? Perhaps you have a rascal for a great grandson and need to find the joy, somehow? My dear Grandmother simply loved being a Great Grandparent. She was known to throw fairy tea parties for her great granddaughters in a magical corner of the garden. There was always cake, fairy dust , roses and chocolate buttons. Tons of buttons. Go and find the joy.

thick big but black girlsvideos

Hello sir. Welcome to 3limes. You have come to the wrong place. We have seen lots of thick and big black buts but have no videos, sorry. No off you go. You saucy boy.

uganda a nice country?

Yes, it is. Are you coming here? Perhaps if you are contemplating a move you might consider a more specific question. Such as: Are the roads smooth? Is there a Starbucks?

i miss you rabbit

Ahhh. Sweet. Did you think that by typing that into the search engines he would hear you? This is not a direct line to Rabbit heaven.

little miss

Oh I know a few of those. What are you interested in? Little Miss Princess? Little Miss Trooper? Little Miss Bossy Boots?  There are certain times of the week when we offer special deals on all of the above. Please pop me an email and we can discuss.

little miss bossy

Oh here you are again. Little Miss Bossy was present at breakfast this morning and is currently out on loan to the Ugandan Armed Forces.

pedicure

Yes. We all need one. Are you enquiring whether we offer them here at 3limes? Or perhaps what one is? I can recommend a rather fine fellow here in Kampala. The current flavour of the week is OPI Strawberry Margarita.

macbeth facebook

Does he have a facebook page? Really? I am going to “friend” him right now.

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Filed under Might be funny

The Tug of Apron Strings

The times are a changing.

I work with adolescents and I live with an adolescent. Trooper will be 13 in less than a week and she is turning into a woman before my very eyes. I can see her moving gently away from me with her secrets, her ideas, her hidden stories; until she creeps back for the occasional cuddle or late night chat.

She has changed her facebook status. It now reads: “In a relationship.”  Putting that up for the world to see was an heady moment for her and one she waited for. She didn’t want to go first, he had to make the statement public before her, but just seeing it up there is a rite of passage that I never had. So now she enters a new era of scorching heartbreak and searing joy. I can no more wrap her in cotton wool and smuggle her into my bed than protect her. She must tread this path alone but know that I am beside her all the way and always on her side.

A good friend who goes way back into the nether reaches of my past just signed up her daughter for kindergarten and I am sure she is feeling the tug of apron strings as her sweet baby will soon proudly don her backpack and head for the gates. We go through so many steps as parents, each one a tiny goodbye as the strings pull back and forth like a struggling and stubborn fish not wanting to be caught.

To a Daughter Leaving Home

When I taught you

at eight to ride

a bicycle, loping along

beside you

as you wobbled away

on two round wheels,

my own mouth rounding

in surprise when you pulled

ahead down the curved

path of the park,

I kept waiting

for the thud

of your crash as I

sprinted to catch up,

while you grew

smaller, more breakable

with distance,

pumping, pumping

for your life, screaming

with laughter,

the hair flapping

behind you like a

handkerchief waving

goodbye.

Linda Paston (b.1932)

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Filed under I have two girls

facebook is weird

Facebook is weird. I know what an old school friend, someone I haven’t seen for 20 years had for breakfast and I have seen the wedding photos of an old work colleague that I imagined I would never see again. I have been sent a friend suggestion that makes me laugh. She was the girl who bullied me at school a life time ago. Do I want to be her friend? Just to know what she is doing somewhere out there in middle America? More importantly do I want her to know what I am doing?

On the flip side I have reconnected with an old school teacher, the most inspiring teacher I ever had, someone who impacts my teaching style every day. I have found a long lost friend that I searched ages for and now we will meet up this summer and exchange memories. I can read the evening plans of two of my old students, I even know what film they are planning on seeing tonight, but does it all really mean anything?  I now have these superficial connections to people that are not really in my life, albeit by a sliver through a computer screen. The people I really want to see, and hug and hold are not living in my white laptop, they are living in my mind, my past and hopefully my future.

Facebook has now overtaken google as the most viewed online search engine. To use a Trini term it is the ultimate “Maco” tool, meaning we can spy on one another and be misled that we know what we are all doing. It presents a warped truth, but one that satisfies some of our curious inclinations. Through Facebook I can see what my daughter’s status is and then berate her for spreading her private life throughout the cyber world. These are things I probably shouldn’t know and yet I keep logging in, coming back for more, looking, as I scroll through the names, for connections, knowledge of what people out there are doing today. It makes the world so small when in many other ways it just feels too big.

Those of us who live so far away, across oceans and continents, shops, markets and deserts, need to feel the world is small.

I just purchased my airline tickets to London this summer and judging by the price of those tickets the world is quite enormous. Instead of looking into my screen to hunt for shiny things and old friends I will have it laid out on a concrete pavement for my delectation and choice. For three weeks I will spend my days in London town, soaking up the culture, the dust, not from red pounded roads, but from smog and the frayed, chipped ancient paint from antique buildings. I will revel, spin and worship at the alter of the Great Shiny West.

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Filed under I have no idea where to put this

Living inside a computer.

Not really very much to write to be truthful. So the question begs, why write at all? Well I made a decision, a resolution really, about writing and I must keep to it. I feel it is good for me and in many ways keeps me sane. There are dark thoughts going around my brain, there are school matters proving most distracting and there are matters of a parental nature, more specifically parenting a nearly teenage girl, that are spinning my thoughts asunder.

It seems not that long ago that Trooper was small and wide eyed, eager to learn all and curl up beside me for a good cuddle and a read. Now things have disappeared into a world of cyber possibilities where gossip and love stories zip across the continents, where hearts are spilled on status pages and multiple conversations take place at once, sometimes between Facebook, MSN and Skype. It has all suddenly appeared to be out of control. Perhaps once school is over and the minimal homework that is doled out is completed, there is not enough to do. We have no TV, there are no neighborhood kids with whom to ride bikes or kick a can, no ice cream shop to walk to and how many hours a day can one really read? So the computer has become a world unto itself and I am not sure I like it.

It cannot be banned, it is here to stay and in fact a very healthy and normal part of adolescence, similar to the amount of time we spent on the phone, those many pre-cell texting years ago, with school friends that we had seen mere minutes before. Then when I went to boarding school we were always together, attached through meals, visits to the loo, long homework sessions where novels were written in the form of  “notes” and we didn’t need any devices to keep us connected, only apart!

A plan is needed. Horse riding lessons will be booked forthwith!

In other news the Entourage addiction continues. We are now on season 5 and I doubt I will ever return to watching TV with commercials. It is quite pleasant to sit and watch two episodes without being interrupted by averts for itchy skin, adult diapers or anti-anxiety medication. If there is one sure way to send you into a depression, American ads will do it. Between shiny cars, oozing beef, and dandruff shampoo, it is quite common to find scary legal firms offering us help with law suits and pharmaceutical companies selling us pills for problems were didn’t know existed. It is not a pretty picture of the world. I do not miss the ads one bit. But I did miss the Golden Globes terribly and I must confess to spending my break in front of People.com looking at the best and worst dresses of the night.


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Filed under Teenagers

From Macbeth to Facebook

Maybe it is writer’s block, but the blog posts haven’t been skipping out of me this week. 

We have finished reading Macbeth! On one day I read Act 5 three times. It gave me a headache but got me thinking about personal responsibility and blame. Macbeth turns into quite an existentialist towards the end. He can’t really see the connection between his actions and the mess Scotland is in. Seems a bit like George Bush. I have no sympathy for W,  yet for Macbeth, the jury is still out. I am amazed how many of my students actually feel sorry for him, despite him being a murderous tyrant. Yet when I mentioned we are going to see the Polanski film version and I told them a bit about Roman’s life they all immediately judged him.  Statutory rape vs Murder. Easy.

A lot of what makes us so judgmental and opinionated is the Media. Once we wake up and recognize how constructed and manipulated we are we start to buy back our own views. In my Media class we are looking at advertisements and how products are targeted to us. Very good stuff. 

On the other hand, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about collecting people. It’s something I tend to do.  When we moved here I told all my friends at home that “No, I won’t make any friends, I am closed, finished, done. No room for more people!” They all laughed.  I haven’t done that badly, I have made a few wonderful friends that I will cherish long after we leave but I have safely put up some armour. Moving so much makes it hard. We spend a lot of time saying goodbye. Sometimes I wonder what  those people I spent weeks laughing with in 1998 are doing now. But why does it matter? As we pass through life we enjoy some people and then move on. We can’t possibly collect them all. And yet I do collect a lot and I work very hard at staying in touch with people. Facebook is a blessing in this regard. I am able to stay connected to past students and work colleagues, but it is minimal contact. 

There is some competitive aspect to Facebook. “How many friends do you have”? “I just hit 100!!”

I am starting to go in the other direction and this week I started to delete people. Maybe it is my aversion to clutter and chaos but if I don’t want to drink coffee with these people then why do I want to be facebook “friends” with them? I would hate to be like one of my students who has 860 friends. That is not friendship that is building a collection.


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Filed under Miss Teacher